How do you create a happy and successful marriage? Have you had, or are you having marital problems? Can you count them? Or are there too many?
One, two, three, five or ten. Do you recall how you dealt with them?
Well, there’s more than one way to skin a cat, right?
Do you worry that you wish you hadn’t gotten married? Do you feel resentment toward the person you married? Do you regret the vows you undertook to be with each other forever?
Problems in any relationship are normal. Worrying about them isn’t going to help – dealing with them in the right way, will.
Remember that in life, there are problems that we need to resolve every day. And when it comes to relationships, we need to use tact and subtlety.
So it is with a marriage. You need to discover ways to manage discord in your relationship. And to maintain the love and respect in your home for years to come.
So let’s take a look at some important points.
What is Marriage?
How did you end up with the overwhelming “tie-the-knot” feeling?
Of course, after the sweetest courtship, you planned it.
The public union of two intimate souls committed to taking care of each other through thick or thin. You’re bound by love as one. Nothing should undo the growing together of two vines, no matter how tangled they get.
Expectations in Married Life…
Now you fathom the significance of your marriage. You start to understand how to deal with each other’s weaknesses to achieve happy and successful marriage. Remember, there is no perfect relationship, nor a perfect union. Happy matrimony must be free from any expectations other than love.
How To Manage Your Relationship
There is no definite formula for a happy and successful marriage. But there are options to consider that could be applied to both of you. So, what could be the best choices a couple should put in place in their marriage?
- Treat your relationship like a “bank account,” (according to the artofmanliness.com).
Yes, you read it right. But you might ask, How is this possible? Let’s talk about this. This is not about a literal connotation of cash money. When I say, a “bank account” it is more about having positive, selfless interactions. Giving rather than receiving.
Investing in your future to reap the rewards later in life. If you don’t save and only spend, (instant, selfish gratification). Then your account will be empty at a time in the future when you most need to rely on it. Withdrawals are taking from your partner. Taking advantage, taking for granted, expecting them to do for you without you giving to them.
- To reverse the side effects of arguments, a “repair attempt” is a requisite. Where the couple uses positive gestures – a smile, a laugh, or an apology with a hug. This breaks the tension and stops the feelings of love from disintegrating.
- Acceptance is the best language of love in your married life. This is where humility and respect have to be the greatest factor to intervene in a heated argument.
- Learn how to listen to your spouse’s viewpoints. Listening is not an admission of inferiority. And don’t wait for your turn to speak; listen to your partner’s concerns. Try to have empathy and see their perspective – it may change your own.
- Communication is one of the most crucial factors in any relationship. Remember that you are no longer alone – you are a partnership; everything has to put a decision, together. How you communicate is key; Finding common ground through sacrifice, compromise, and concession.
- Spending more time together. Plan for a date night. Never take one another for granted. You must always find time for an “alone” moment, a romantic date, a picnic or watch a movie. The two of you is enough. Try to rekindle the essence of how you both fell in love in the first place.
- To have regular sex (both of you need to agree when is the best time to do it).
Lifetime Commitment
Now you have the best options on how to keep your marriage happy and successful. It’s now your ultimate goal to be together for a lifetime, right? How will you keep it stronger like the Llangernyw tree (oldest tree in North Wales)? These too can support your lifetime commitment. For a happy and successful marriage goal.
- Never thought of selfishness.
- You support each other’s aspirations. Never allow any controlling behavior as narcissists do.
- Trust each other. – It’s the most important factor in communication.
- Be honest at all costs. Never hide anything from each especially about money.
- Be patient and forgiving. You have the union of matrimony, so do your best to grow it with love, respect, and forgiveness.
Every couple engages in a battle of wills. Neither I nor you have an easy way to handle marital issues. It takes a lot of courage to build a happy and successful marriage along with your difficult stages.
Yet, you should not forget the sanctity of your vows. You’re given the privilege to enjoy and commit to the sacrament of matrimony. After all, it was your own choice to be with the person you love and to live with forever.
Chaos in relationships will then pacified and managed through the language of love.
Never tire of giving your trust and forgiveness. This is how your happy and successful marriage starts. Hence, grow old together and “go into the world and multiply.” and managed through the language of love.
Never tire of giving your trust and forgiveness. This is how your happy and successful marriage starts. Hence, grow old together and “go into the world and multiply.”
SOURCES: https://www.marriage.com/
Life's Journey and Reflections 